TO ALL FREE WILL BAPTISTS

From the time I was about 12 years old, I knew that God wanted me to be a missionary. Even when people told me I couldn't do it or made fun of me, I still kept pushing toward that goal. I love people and I love being in different cultures. This is the reason I am going into debt and making myself go crazy from the school work. However in light of recent circumstances, I do not know if this will be possible. Free Will Baptist International Missions released a statement this week that they are no longer sending new missionaries and those current missionaries in the states have to stay until further notice.

I cannot tell you how much this breaks my heart! I have had the amazing opportunity to Volunteer down at International Missions this past semester. I have also been able to travel around the world and visit our missionaries. They are doing some incredible things! They have given their entire lives to telling others about Christ. It is their passion and God"s light is being shown in some really dark places. They are obeying the message that is clear throughout the Scriptures to go and tell. 

Now they are being told I'm sorry you cannot go back to your field, you have to stay here. Why is this? Money. FWBIM is making them stay so they can go around to our churches and beg us for money. How sad is this? IT IS TIME FOR US TO WAKE UP!!!!!!!! The church exists to spread the light of Jesus, not to give you a place to go to once a week to make you happy! I am sick and tired of all the fighting and the bickering between FREE WILL BAPTISTS brothers and sisters! This is our fault for letting our money be more important than the souls of people. Because of our greediness people are going to Hell, and you will answer for it. 

What have we become?! We spend more time arguing over things like a stupid funding system than actually doing what we are supposed to. Do you not have faith in our God to use the money the best way possible? Money is temporal, souls are not! You are not going, you are sitting on your butts, at home, comfortable, spending your money on yourself. That is the definition of selfishness. May God forgive us for letting ourselves get in the way of His plan. 

I am a new generation, and I refuse to just sit by and watch all of this happen! Our missionaries are my heroes because they have given up everything for God. That is what we teach in Sunday school is the mark of a true Christian, but no one believes it anymore. Actions speak louder than words. We are failing in our job of the great commission. It is time for us to wake up to the world that is going to Hell around us. Your money is not really yours. It belongs to the almighty creator who gives it to you so that you can be a blessing.   Get past your selfishness and your greediness and support the missionaries that are on the field! You will answer to God one day for what you do! DO you want Him to say "Well done," or, "Look at all these souls that are in Hell because you did nothing?"

I am sorry if this sounds mean, but it is the truth. I am speaking to every single Free Will Baptist. I know that there are those of you out there that do support IM, but you can do more. We need people to step up and give and we need people to step up and confront those who are doing nothing. We have thousands of us out there, there should be no reason for this mess. The Bible tells us not to let divisions come into the church, so why are we letting things get in the way of being one united force in the world? I do not care about your preferences. God is much bigger than you. Stop being selfish and do what it is that God has called you to do. This is the true mark of a Christian- putting others before yourself. If we are not careful IM will be gone and FWB will be too! 

Lord, I pray that you will forgive us for being selfish. Forgive us for not doing what you have asked us to do. Please change our hearts so that we may take you to a lost world. I pray for our missionaries, give them strength and help them not to get discouraged. Please let them know there are some of us on their side! Please give them a special blessing. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.

WHY AM I HERE?

I have found myself asking this question alot lately. Why am I at the Free Will Baptist Bible College putting myself through all of the stress of getting a degree that I can't really use in America? Why do I have to write this paper, and get a  good grade? Why am I going thousands of dollars into debt when I could go to another college for free? It is because I have been called by God for a greater purpose than that.

I am nothing special. I'm just a girl with alot of hang-ups and problems, but God chose to use me in a great way. I don't understand the amount of grace that he has shown me or why he chooses to forgive me over and over and over again, but He does willingly. If God can use me he can use anybody!

And God wants to use YOU!! He has called each one of us but he doesn't make us choose him. My generation has forgotten what true servanthood is. We are not being taught to give up everything and serve God. We are taught that sucess equals weath and prosperity. we go to school to get a good job to make alot of money so we will be happy but this is not true! This is the road to unhappiness! I'm not saying that weath in and of itself is bad, but it takes our dependency off of god and puts it on ourselves. (Sorry for that little rabbit trail!)

We need young people to step up and answer God's call in their lives to be preachers and missionaries. We need the older people in our churches to start teaching these young people about servanthood and about the call of God. We should be encouraging them to seek God's plans for their lives and not just about him. Our lives are a relationship not a leaningpost. We should be loving God, talking with Him, and getting to know Him so that we know what He has for us, not just calling on him for help when we need it!

Have you answered the Call? It's not this mysterious thing, its not necessarily a voice you hear, it is a knowledge deep down inside of you that you were created with a purpose. For me it was the feeling I got when I heard missionary stories or went on missions trips. I am never happier than when I am serving God with my whole heart in a cross-cultural setting. Its not easy and it wont lead me to great riches, but I know that I know that I know that God has called me to be a missionary. That is why I am here at FWBBC, why I am stressing over a paper that is due on Friday, and why I just took out a loan that will take me years to pay off. Because God has called me to and I said yes!

The New Generation

I know it has been a couple of months since I have written but it has been a crazy time in my life. I am quickly learning about good time management and how to keep a detailed planner/schedule. I know that my trip is over but I want to try and just write about things in this world as I see them. 

Yesterday was Sunday and I was excited to go to my church. I truly love going there and it is so exciting to be able to worship with this group of people every week! I looked around our congregation, we have a very diverse group of people. We have alot of older adults who are great role models for me, we have middle age adults who our church is reaching out to that have come from some rough backgrounds. We have alot of 20 somethings too. The problem though is that these younger people are not stepping up. The older adults are getting to the point that it is hard for them to teach the younger children and our youth pastor and children's pastor are having to do everything by themselves. 

I am teaching children's church now on Sundays. I am not a teacher kind of person but I saw a need and I am stepping up. I had 8 very hyper 3-5 years olds and so I needed a helper. I asked 5 different students to help me and they all had a different excuse. 

My generation is all about "what is good for me?" They are so selfish. God did not call us to go to church to warm the pews. Christians were called to serve to tell others about Jesus. What has happened to this teaching? Why are Scott and Derek having to beg people to help them when we have at least 10 students from BIBLE COLLEGE alone going there. I have a hard time believing that a person is called to be a pastor or in some form of ministry when they can't serve in a lay person role. I know not all people work well with children but there is a ministry in every church for every person! Before I went to Panama my professor had me read a book on servant leadership, leadership is not possible until you know how to serve God by serving others. 

Acts 26:16-18 gives us a picture of what we are called to do. It is by being a servant and a witness that people are reached and souls are saved from a horrible eternity in Hell. 

¹⁶But rise and stand upon your feet, for I have appeared to you for this purpose, to appoint you as a servant and witness to the things in which you have seen me and to those in which I will appear to you, ¹⁷ delivering you from your people and from the Gentiles— to whom I am sending you ¹⁸ to open their eyes, so that they may turn from darkness to light and from the power of Satan to God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me.'

The older generation is moving on and it is our turn to get up off our behinds and do something. If we continue to become pew ornaments while the world all around us is going to hell then I have to question whether we deserve the right to go to Heaven... we should be willing to die for our Lord as the early Christians did, not be bribed to help out. 

Think about it are you doing what you have been called to do? Are you truly being a servant? Are you sending people to Hell today?

WOW...

Hey friends!

I am sooooo sorry it has been so long since I have written. E-TEAM arrived June 15 and I have been super busy ever since! I had the awesome opportunity to be a part of their team and I got to travel around different parts of Panama with them. It has been two weeks of an up and down roller coaster. I am exhausted but it was so worth it!

 I will try to give a quick day by day for the last two weeks.

June 16- Orientation with E-TEAM and working around the Seminary
June 17-Prepared for the event on Saturday
June 18- We had a huge outreach event for the community here at the Seminary. It was a day of games and sports for kids ages 5 and up. We had about 200 people who came and it was an awesome day. E-TEAM did their program and we had one little boy named Carlos give his heart to Jesus! By the end of the day we were all exhausted but it was wonderful. Saturday night I went back to Santiago with the Collins to help them prepare for E-TEAM who would be there Monday morning.
June 19- I went to church in Chitre with the Collins. I helped Mrs. Brenda with children's church which is always quite an experience! We ate lunch at the church since it was Father's day and then headed back to Santiago. I enjoyed a very relaxing night hanging out with the Collins and it was wonderful!
June 20- We got up and ate breakfast then I helped clean the house and the started cutting out flannel-graph.  E-TEAM got there and then we assigned their jobs. A few of the girls were in charge of cutting out flannel graph and then the rest went out and sanded down benches the Mr. Paul has made for their services. After lunch one of the boys from E-TEAM taught me how to play a song on the guitar! I now also know how to play the bass guitar which I am super excited about. Then we prepared for a BIRTHDAY PARTY we had been invited to that night. That was a really cool experience. We sang a few songs in Spanish and a few in English and got to be a part of the celebration. the really cool thing though was that this lady is one of the people that we reached the first weekend I was here in Santiago. When the group was out passing out invitations to "The Night of Drama" they came to her house and shared the Gospel with her. She was saved and Julio and Mr. Paul have been having Bible studies with her and her family ever since. Praise the Lord for this dear lady!
June 21- I got up at 5 something to start fixing breakfast. We had breakfast and then I left Santiago with E-TEAM to head to Panonome. We worked hard cleaning up a park. The boys got out there and cut down all the tall stuff with the machetes and the girls scraped and painted benches. We also pulled leaves and picked up trash. It was a really sunny day and most of us ended up with some bad sunburns. Everyone worked hard until about 3. We cleaned up and then got ready for our program that we were having in the same park that night. It was pretty awesome and we had 25-30 people who came! We finished the day with Chineese food and headed back to Chame.
 Got to go fix lunch, I'll finish later!
<3 Bethany

I JUST WANT TO GO TO SLEEP!!

Hey friends!

I am so tired. I have not slept more than 3 hours for the last two nights! I cannot seem to fall asleep, and this equals tired cranky Bethany.

This week has flown by. We had so much to get done for E-TEAM and we even moved on Monday so I have stayed pretty busy.

E-TEAM finally got in at about 2  this morning. They had quite an adventure getting here! We have alot to do in the short time they are here but I will try to update as often as I can!

My spanish is improving. Two of the boys have determined to make me learn it and our now my "teachers" After dinner they make me sit and practice! It is so funny, but they say I'm improving!

I had another first this week. I played my first game of soccer. I had so much fun and they said I did good. I did manage to sprain my wrist of all things! It hurts but it is slowly getting better.

I'm sorry my thoughts are all over the place. I'm a little scattered- brained right now! =)

Hasta Luego,
Bethany

Thank God for Tylenol and cough drops!

Whew am I glad this week is over! My week started out with me being sick. I didn't get out of bed for almost 2 days! Thankfully Mrs. Judy and Ariadna took care of me and many tylenol, two boxes of kleenex, and a pack of cough drops later I am finally getting better! 

We had alot of people here with us this week! We had 4 teenagers that came the beginning of the week and stayed 2 night. We also were tearing the ceilings out of the classroom building to put up new ones so we had a bunch of people here to help out with that. We also had a family who came here on vacation for a couple days so at one point we had about 35 people on campus!

Thursday was a Long, fun, and interesting day. Mrs. Judy, Ari, and I went into the city. We spent the ENTIRE day there shoping for things for the event we are having on June 18 and E-TEAM. I got to see the worst part of the city and the nicest part. It was like night and day difference. One part of the City looks like Southern California and another looks like it has been through several wars. At one point Mrs. Judy says to me, "I am not sure if this is the right road, hopefully we live to find out." At first I thought she was joking but apparently that was not a good area. We went to this one place that is just one little shop after another where you can get little kids toys cheap and we got some of the stuff for our carnival. We got 40 barbie type things and they bring us a garbage bad with the dolls in it, counted out the shoes and gave us the folded up boxes, we have to put them together ourselves. It was so funny to me! =) We also went to this market type place. It was like a street with tons of "shops" but you cant drive down it. It was funny to see some of the things people were selling. One guy was sitting there selling eggs but he was asleep! One guy was pushing a cart of furniture around. Nothing really surprises me anymore! Needless to say, Thursday was quite a cultural experience for me!

My Spanish is improving, but I am so frustrated because I cannot speak it very well!! It is very frustrating not being able to communicate with people! I was able to have about a 2 or 3 hour conversation in Spanish last night, but it was very slow and on facebook. I had a verb tense book, a spanish dictionary, and a translator helping me when I got stuck. It would take me 15 minutes for 2 sentences but I did it. Please pray that I will learn quickly!

We are moving down the street on Monday so I should be packing. Please pray for us and for E-TEAM as they arrive on Wednesday. It will be a busy busy time.

Dios te bendiga,
Bethany

F. R. O. G.

Hey everbody!

I'm sorry it has been so long since I have updated, I have been so busy. Wednesday I successfully taught my 2nd English class! This week I have my 3rd class and we will be talking about the calendar and our likes and dislikes.

On Thursday something really exciting happened. There is a couple from Cuba who have been trying to get here to help at the seminary for over a year. We have been praying for so long that the paperwork would go through and she would be granted permission to leave the country. On thursday night they finally arrived!!! Praise the Lord! Everyone was so excited and it is a huge relief To Mr. Steve and Mrs. Judy as they are going home on furlow for three months. Please keep praying for this couple as they have to now file paperwork for more permanent visas so they can stay!

Friday I went up to the city with Mrs. Judy because she was speaking at a lady's meeting. We got into town early so we went to the mall... it was HUGE!!! I had fun shopping and clothes are sooo much cheaper here! I got a watch and a new shirt for 6 bucks! =) We had dinner at Johnny Rockets and then headed to the church. The driving here is CRAZY and I would be a nervous wreck if I was the one driving haha. The meeting was good and I really enjoyed it!

Saturday was our lazy day. I got to sleep in till 7 and didn't do much of anything till about 3. Mrs. Judy and I left at 3 to go to the grocery store. We took like a 2 hour detour and went up into the mountains. It was so beautiful!! Up there it doesn't look like Panama anymore. There are no Palm trees and its nice and cool. Everything is green and there were even a couple pine trees! I really enjoyed our little trip! We then went to the grocery store and we had a time there. We kept running into everybody and knocking things over... haha. We got KFC for dinner and headed home.

Yesterday was a long day. There is not a church here in Chame or anywhere close and Mr. Steve was speaking at the first church in the City. We got up and left about 8:30. Sunday school was supposed to start at 9:30 but was just starting when we got there at 10. So we had sunday school then a bunch of other stuff and a break. the worship service started at 11:30 and we got out at 1:30. (which they say is early for this church) By the time we got lunch and got home it was 4:30. I started feeling bad on the way home last night and by supper I was feeling terrible. (running a fever in 90 degree weather is no fun!) So I ate dinner and talked to my sister on skype then headed to bed.

When I woke up this morning I felt horrible. I have no voice and I have stayed in bed most of the day. Please keep me in your prayers!

Love
Bethany